questions that piss you off

[numbnuts240]

ever get those retarded questions that just ruin your day? it's the most asinine question, yet it drives a thorn so far up your a**, your ears tingle.

"hey, did you get a haircut?"
"no, douchebag, my hair naturally recedes back into my scalp when i gets too long."

*after sneezing*
"uh oh, sounds like somebody is coming down with a cold..."
"or maybe, just maybe, my nose didn't agree with your decision to douse yourself in that s*** perfume a few seconds ago."

"what's for lunch today?"
"eh, just a salad."
"going on a diet?"
"wtf is that supposed to mean? a fatty can't enjoy a f*** salad every now and again? did you happen to notice that the contents of an entire bottle of dressing is smothering my lettuce?"

*while at the register*
"that'll be $11.50."
*hand them a $20 bill*
"out of 20?"
"no, actually that's a 10. i cleverly made that 1 to look like a 2 in order to gain some profit in this transaction."

i hate people.

[Razi]

I'm pretty sure they say "Out of 20?" to make sure you know that they know it's a 20.
I don't trust the sloths that run the cash register so I don't mind when they tell me it's out of a 20 or whatever I handed them.
Sometimes they say "Out of 20?" when I've handed them a $50. Learn to read numbers.

Also:
"Why is my computer broken?"
How the hell should I know?

[Jesda]

[numbnuts240]

LIKE COW DISEASE!!!!!!

[AppleBonker]

"what's for lunch today?"
"eh, just a salad."
"going on a diet?"
"wtf is that supposed to mean? a fatty can't enjoy a f**king salad every now and again? did you happen to notice that the contents of an entire bottle of dressing is smothering my lettuce?"

Please realize that the average US citizen believes this is the proper way to eat a salad. And, therefor, it would be the healthy way to eat a salad. No wonder we are an increasingly fat country.

[numbnuts240]

but it was fat free dressing

[S13_love]

"Can I ask you a question?"

...

[numbnuts240]

"Can I ask you a question?"

...

when that happens, don't answer. just stare blankly back at them. they get all uncomfortable. it's hilarious.

[Jesda]

"Can I ask you a question?"

...

Answer: "Sorry, I don't speak any English at all, except for this exact sentence which I learned with the help of a translation book I purchased at Borders."

[Frank E Bones]

One thing I really cant stand is drive-thru's, when after every single thing you order there like "is that it?" Damn bro sorry to bother you with my order.

[93coupe]

What's in your ear?
Jewelry, f***!

Can you turn your shirt inside out?

[sx moneypit]

I can't stand it when it is 150 degrees in my shop and someone asks,is it hot enough for you? I want to kill them.

[AppleBonker]

Can you turn your shirt inside out?

This. x10

[4cefed]

What kind of engine should I put in my 240SX?

[Jesda]

Can you turn your shirt inside out?

Who in the world asks that?!?

[93coupe]

What kind of engine should I put in my 240SX?

ka-t or sr?

[93coupe]

Can you turn your shirt inside out?

Who in the world asks that?!?

Bob Evens.

[sx moneypit]

What kind of engine should I put in my 240SX?

ka-t or sr?

[Jesda]

Bob Evens.

Sounds like he just wants to see you take your shirt off.

[93coupe]

Well, I do work out.

[AppleBonker]

Well, I do work out.

[93coupe]

"hey, did you get a haircut?"
"no, douchebag, my hair naturally recedes back into my scalp when i gets too long."

[93coupe]

I need more oil.

[numbnuts240]

that gif is pretty damned creepy, tbqh.

[MinisterofDOOM]

*after sneezing*
"uh oh, sounds like somebody is coming down with a cold..."
"or maybe, just maybe, my nose didn't agree with your decision to douse yourself in that s*** perfume a few seconds ago."

This one confuses me so much it surpasses irritation. COLDS do not make you SNEEZE. They make you COUGH. There is a difference.

*while at the register*
"that'll be $11.50."
*hand them a $20 bill*
"out of 20?"
"no, actually that's a 10. i cleverly made that 1 to look like a 2 in order to gain some profit in this transaction."

I definitely prefer that the cashier clarify how much money they think I gave them. I don't trust them and often don't trust my own ability to count bills. Them being sure about my money is never a bad thing.

[Ajax]

I'm an actor and I find it annoying when a stage manager knocks on a dressing room door and asks "are you decent?" Of course not! I'm a freaking actor! This might be funny only to people who are into theatre.

[PEZi]

*sitting on couch watching tv*
"Hey! What are doing?"

"What the fack does it look like!?"

[krimsonviper]

ever get those retarded questions that just ruin your day? it's the most asinine question, yet it drives a thorn so far up your a**, your ears tingle.

This^.

*while at the register*
"that'll be $11.50."
*hand them a $20 bill*
"out of 20?"
"no, actually that's a 10. i cleverly made that 1 to look like a 2 in order to gain some profit in this transaction."

In my defense of saying this, I'm simply verifying that they want to use the bill they gave me. A couple times they gave me $50 or $100 bill when paying for a bottle water and they were drunk.

Eat it my little Love Muffin!

[numbnuts240]

you got squinty, shifty eyes. you're supposed to ask because you can't be trusted.

[MellowZ32]

you got squinty, shifty eyes. you're supposed to ask because you can't be trusted.

das racist!