Ok, popular culture has finally made a dent in my world. The term "Honey Boo Boo" has finally gotten enough rotation that I am curious enough to invest 5 minutes of my life to examine it.
I only made it 2 minutes into the youtube video before I had to shut it off. I cried a little and contemplated the ramifications on our society.
I wish I could say people like this are something I have never seen, but that would be a lie. I have seen people like this. I know people like this.
We are f*** doomed. They are breeding at an outlandish rate and will soon be the dominant species in America at least. Snorting, farting, taking up more space and resources than a single human should and skewing the bell curve further to the inbred ingnorant bovine end of the spectrum.
It's not funny. It's not cute. It's tragic. It's alarming. It's unacceptable. We should be able to hunt them like wild boars. Every season, the local municipality should alot licenced hunters a certain number of tickets to thin the herds of scumbags like this.
They can be baited with open cans of Old Milwaukee, discarded moon pies and, KFC chicken. You can track them by following their garbage and looking for fresh unine stains they use to mark their territory.
Don't eat them, though. Surely you would die of a heart attack from the injection of blubber laced with lyme disease, copenhagen and meth emphetamines. No, just drop them. I doubt a head shot to a vacant cranium would even slow them down as they charge the front doors at Walmart. Hit em in the chest, right in the spagettios stain.
If not for the illegality of the pursuit it would be a worthwhile goal in a human life to remove as many of them from the gene pool as possible.
I am not religious, but I think today I will hit my knees and take a stab at it. Please god, if you're listening, spin up some tornados and wipe the surface of the earth clean of this festering infection of ignorant, vulgar, useless people. I know you have the proclivity. Twisters hit trailer parks and K-Marts too frequently to be a coincidence.
I'm going to go buy a brats doll get drunk and beat it to death with a hammer.
