What to do with $1.25 MILLION dollars

[nissangirl74]

What would you do if you had $1.25 million dollars? Retire? Get out of debt? Buy a big house? Buy a garage full of expensive and exotic cars? If so, you would probably share in the majority opinion.

Someone in the AZ legislature has a different idea, and you ain't even going to believe this....a bridge for our squirrels...... http://abcnews.go.com/US/Broadcast/ariz ... d=10934895

[AZ89two4Tsx]

[ADDirishboy]

Aren't we crazy in debt? s***, Tucson is leasing government buildings to anyone who wants to pay the rent. Plus, aren't we raising the sales tax to help fund our schools? That 1.25 mil could be spend much better.

Also, how do we teach the squirrels to use this bridge? Maybe the reason they're endangered is because they're too stupid to keep themselves alive.

[nissangirl74]

Also, how do we teach the squirrels to use this bridge?

I heard more about this on the radio today. Apparently someone who is well-versed in squirrel-o-logy claims that if you build it, the squirrels will inately know how to use it.

[AZ89two4Tsx]

I understand taking into consideration the animals when building things like roads/bridges, but there's just a point where you have to draw the line.

[PEZi]

i'd build a bridge for squirrels....

[nissangirl74]

Sometimes Darwin wins.

[ADDirishboy]

I heard more about this on the radio today. Apparently someone who is well-versed in squirrel-o-logy claims that if you build it, the squirrels will inately know how to use it.

Steve Irwin died though....

I understand taking into consideration the animals when building things like roads/bridges, but there's just a point where you have to draw the line.

It's a squirrel. There are plenty of other squirrels. I don't care about this sub-species. They can lick my balls. There are only 250 of them left anyway.

Plus, cars only kill about five every YEAR. This is just retarded. f*** hippies.

[93coupe]

Also, how do we teach the squirrels to use this bridge?

I heard more about this on the radio today. Apparently someone who is well-versed in squirrel-o-logy claims that if you build it, the squirrels will inately know how to use it.

Of course they will know how to use it. It's called walking, mother f***! What squirrel doesn't know how to walk?!

[nissangirl74]

Canada built a bridge for the elk.

http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=htt ... WaMpejmLEF

[ADDirishboy]

Canada built a bridge for the elk.

http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=htt ... WaMpejmLEF

I actually understand that one. If someone runs over a squirrel, nothing bad happens except a squirrel gets its organs forcibly shoved out its a** and eye sockets simultaneously. If someone hits an elk, well, yea.

[93coupe]

Canada built a bridge for the elk.

http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=htt ... WaMpejmLEF

I actually understand that one. If someone runs over a squirrel, nothing bad happens except a squirrel gets its organs forcibly shoved out its a** and eye sockets simultaneously. If someone hits an elk, well, yea.

A squirrel would rip my front lip off.

[nissangirl74]

I actually understand that one. If someone runs over a squirrel, nothing bad happens except a squirrel gets its organs forcibly shoved out its a** and eye sockets simultaneously. If someone hits an elk, well, yea.

Something like this

http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=htt ... zyM8OqjKgF

[Razi]

At least you guys have money.
California took money out of the school system because the money we had before was spent badly.
Cool, make the students pay.

[MellowZ32]

[Jesda]

Mexican drug cartel will stuck heroin balloons up the buttholes of squirrels and send them over the bridge.

[s0m3th1ngAZ]

So now we'll have hordes of smacked out squirrels running (well..stumbling) around?
Wtf man.

[numbnuts240]

ok, as asinine as this is, we're all forgetting to ask one important question...why does it cost 1.25 million dollars to tie a series of ropes to trees on opposing sides of a single road? this shouldn't even cost 5k. what am i missing here?

[AppleBonker]

Damn you and your profession, Tita. But you are spot-on. Are they planning on building this out of concrete? And how big?

[numbnuts240]

Damn you and your profession, Tita. But you are spot-on. Are they planning on building this out of concrete? And how big?

i'm conditioned to finding the cheapest way to do something in the most effective manner. and definitely not concrete

"The Federal Highway Administration grant will be used to build rope bridges over the lone road through the squirrels' habitat"

i just hope they're not planning on building a bunch of these for some tree rats



this will suffice, and i'll gladly install them for 500k. alone.



i'll throw in the ape for an additional tree fiddy.

[Looneybomber]

ok, as asinine as this is, we're all forgetting to ask one important question...why does it cost 1.25 million dollars to tie a series of ropes to trees on opposing sides of a single road? this shouldn't even cost 5k. what am i missing here?

They're installing 41 bridges at a cost of 400k; materials and labor. It's a state job, so you have to pay for a bunch of extra workers to do nothing.

[numbnuts240]

ok, so what's the additional 850k for? rope is cheap, so are mexicans. oh wait, az already started getting rid of them. they should have waited to pass that law, amirite?

[Bubba1]

Mexican drug cartel will stuck heroin balloons up the buttholes of squirrels and send them over the bridge.

It is moronic and amusing. It would be cheaper for the state to pay to fly in and release squirrels via 1st class airfare on United rather than build a bridge.

I think the inevitable followup project will be a special commission to somewhow convince wild squirrels to actually use the bridges they build.

[Loki]

I will wait right here for the FAIL pictures of a roadkill squirrel with the special bridge in the background next to it.

[numbnuts240]

[youngmoney]

we're building bridges for RODENTS?! was the governor like "i know people are struggling,but dammit those vermin are just so damn cute"?

now we're just helping hoodlums like this get around easier...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0so5er4X3dc

[numbnuts240]

[ADDirishboy]

ok, so what's the additional 850k for? rope is cheap, so are mexicans. oh wait, az already started getting rid of them. they should have waited to pass that law, amirite?

Truth. Granted, I can still hire some Messicans from Home Depot if I'm not impeding traffic when I stop to pick them up. I'll have it done for $500, a few burritos and a case of corona.

[numbnuts240]

f*** the illegals, i'd do it for that amount.

[Looneybomber]

ok, so what's the additional 850k for? rope is cheap, so are mexicans. oh wait, az already started getting rid of them. they should have waited to pass that law, amirite?

Come on, did you even read the article?
" The Federal Highway Administration grant will be used to build rope bridges over the lone road through the squirrels' habitat, according to Arizona Department of Transportation Community Relations Director Timothy Tait. The DOT plans to install 41 of the "canopy tunnel crossings" at a cost of $400,000.

Another $160,000 will be spent on cameras to monitor the bridges, and the rest of the money will fund a project to monitor the rodents. "