New York Man Plunges 40 Stories, Survives

[Encryptshun]

Like Darwin said -- If God wanted us to fly, he would have set into motion a chain of events wherein the earth, over millions of years developed, morphed, and changed certain single-celled organisms into families of specialized biological traits designed to protect the most prized genetic code and eliminate or mutate the inferior code with the express purpose of ensuring that h0mo avians (and no, that doesn't mean gay birds because God don't like teh gays) became the dominant life form on the planet and therefore would have allowed this individual to land gracefully on the hood of the car without making an absolute muckery of it all and forcing us to have this atrociously prolonged conversation about why some random dude was so full of fail that he couldn't even properly off himself.

[Speedy7_7]

It is possible, but it has only been recorded as ever happening once. (without a parachute, even a broken parachute.) That guy hit the ground at terminal velocity, he landed in a nicely plowed field, and he survived. For 16 minutes. Find me evidence that physics don't apply when you have "know-how"

There are a lot more recorded instances than that. A stewardess, WW2 airmen, a russian parachuter... Though it's still a .01% chance you will survive a mile high fall. By know-how i mean lessening your terminal velocity, aiming for frothy water, trees, pillow factories, landing correctly, etc...

Landing correctly? I suppose you could open the roof of a football stadium that has been filled with pillows.


And I don't trust a wikihow article that recommends diving into water. At 120mph, your screwed either way. Just hope that the reason you're falling from that distance is because you fell out of a plane doing 500+mph, cause at least you'll be unconscious (and naked, apparently the force blows your clothes off and knocks you out until the water or land finishes the job by turning your vital organs into dead mash).

[DrifterXRPS13]

unconscious and naked you say....hrmmm...

[RCA]

Like Darwin said -- If God wanted us to fly, he would have set into motion a chain of events wherein the earth, over millions of years developed, morphed, and changed certain single-celled organisms into families of specialized biological traits designed to protect the most prized genetic code and eliminate or mutate the inferior code with the express purpose of ensuring that h0mo avians (and no, that doesn't mean gay birds because God don't like teh gays) became the dominant life form on the planet and therefore would have allowed this individual to land gracefully on the hood of the car without making an absolute muckery of it all and forcing us to have this atrociously prolonged conversation about why some random dude was so full of fail that he couldn't even properly off himself.

I want to hug you.

[Razi]

Spectacularly brillant. I lol'ed for realz.

+1

[TU_MADRE]

Perhaps the jumper was despondent after learning he was related to Nala.

Whatever happened to the ol fuzzball anyway?

[IanS]

Like Darwin said -- If God wanted us to fly, he would have set into motion a chain of events wherein the earth, over millions of years developed, morphed, and changed certain single-celled organisms into families of specialized biological traits designed to protect the most prized genetic code and eliminate or mutate the inferior code with the express purpose of ensuring that h0mo avians (and no, that doesn't mean gay birds because God don't like teh gays) became the dominant life form on the planet and therefore would have allowed this individual to land gracefully on the hood of the car without making an absolute muckery of it all and forcing us to have this atrociously prolonged conversation about why some random dude was so full of fail that he couldn't even properly off himself.

Hero for the day award goes to you.

Excellent

[Jesda]

[RCA]

So much win in this thread...

Mario picture... LMAO

[troskinatior]

He landed in the backseat area of a Dodge Charger after crashing through the windshield.

How do you fall down, hit the front of a car, and land in the back seat?

Maybe he was driving up the side of the building?

[krash]

Maybe he was driving up the side of the building?

Long back window?

The story says he jumped. It also says, Police are investigating why he jumped.

Ummmm, wow. Got some real sharp cookies up there.

He could have seen a lucky penny!

[troskinatior]

If I wasnt lazy id photoshop those buildings 90* clock wise

[JoseBronx]

Maybe he just really hates Dodge Chargers and/or life.

at least we know theyre good for one thing