I've never had feelings like this...

[The Mic]

I never expressed fear of losing a friend. I also never told him to sit on his laurels.

What I was saying is that he ought not rush things, because he could get some sort of relationship out of this either way. More importantly, rushing leads to bad situations overall.

My statements hadn't the slightest thing to do with the fear of rejection.

Trust me, I have a friend whom I've nearly dated many times, but we're still good friends despite both of us getting rejected by the other multiple times.

"A bajillion times hotter than her" screams of jealousy and anger at your rejection.

If after a first date (he should definitely start moving that direction if he feels ready to) he can't get a date with her again, she may just not be interested in general. Whether or not he played the wrong cards. Moreover, if he was himself the whole night and he can't get a second date, they aren't a good match anyway. (Though I also argue that it takes more than one date to really decide anything, but we're assuming she disagrees with that argument.)

I agree with Altiman, I detect a hint of arrogance here. Sure I haven't gone out with dozens of girls but I thought I'd share my few experiences. I wasn't referring to you at all, I was referring to my own experiences of regret when I could've, should've and would've with past girls. I just thought I'd chim in now that I've been together with my gf for 5+ mos and that I probably did something right because she is hot, the kind hot thats intimidating. Then again, who wouldn't think their gf is hot. But then again you might have your doubts and think "yeah whatever guy" so i won't even bother. I see you still have some growing up to do, since you just have to criticize an opinion that may appear contrary to yours and you can't just leave it be. You come off as if you have something to prove, (major turn off ) , whether it'd be knowledge or otherwise.

"A bajillion times hotter than her" screams of jealousy and anger at your rejection.

Your statement couldn't be more erroneous. I don't know how you came to that really, it shows more arrogance than thought. Please elaborate how moving on and expressing my gf's actual nature is "screams of jealousy and anger" due to my rejection, I would really like to hear your explanation since you don't know me, let alone have knowledge of my relationships.

darn, out of cough syrup. :coughs: :coughs:
Modified by S13GUY at 9:50 PM 9/18/2004

[nametakennow]

You make her sound like a complete witch, that's all.

I'm going by my experience as well. I haven't gone out with dozens of girls either, and I'm definitely going on just the experiences I've had too. I don't regret a thing because I learned from each and every one.

My first gf and I were together 13 months, I learned a lot from that one. Since then I've bounced around a bit searching for some hint of understanding as to the female nature.

I understand that you think she's absolutely gorgeous, but the way you put it sounds combative, that's all I meant.

If either of us has growing up to do, it's you for making a comment that petty. I understand, however, if you didn't mean for it to come off that way. It is, after all, the internet.

I have nothing really to prove, only experiences to share. I know I have a hell of a lot of learning to do when it comes to women, but from what I have learned I try to help as much as I can. Additionally, the statement that she's "the kind of hot that's intimidating" sounds like you have something to prove.

I made the comments directly at you because your initial post was entirely the kind of immature thing I've come to expect from rejected and bitter people.

[jdmfreak]

?

He knows his stuff. And this is coming from my mouth. So it means something right? If I opened my mouth in every girl thread, youd think Id be arrogant too.

BTW, I have refused to be in all relationships for the past 4 years and some how I know a lot more than many that always have g/f or b/fs.

The only thing he has that I dont is actual experience with g/fs, but like I said I dont even need that. So I say we are about equal.

Ya think Im arrogant too?

[The Mic]

Oh come on, what guy doesn't think their gf is hot. I really don't see anything wrong with that. If i had something to prove I would have said something like "ans i can guarantee shes hotter than any gf youve had!". Really now I mean, you come off as is if you actually believe you know something we don't. The reason I am pointing it out now is because you actually said something directed at me, in pasts posts about relationships you have always acted in the same manner when other people offred their view. I thought "w/e this guy will get it sooner or later" and I minded my own business. It was inevitable that someone at some point had to tell you, "maybe this other guys ideas better". To be able to accept that is called Maturity.

I made the comments directly at you because your initial post was entirely the kind of immature thing I've come to expect from rejected and bitter people.

This is the kind of thing that actually says what I've been saying. I don't know who do you think you are to place a label like that on people you don't even know.

edit: ok now i feel bad lol. sorry for throwing such a tantrum its just that i just had an argument and im not in the best mood. what im just trying to say it just dont shoot down another's opinion though it maybe be wrong. Just leave it be, I dont see anythin wrong with that =]
Modified by S13GUY at 10:48 PM 9/18/2004

[nametakennow]

I accept that. In the past I've read things on here and on other forums that I've not only agreed with, but actually found helpful in my own wanderings.

I don't intend to come off as knowing more than everyone else, or really anyone else, but in the case that I see something bitter and downcast towards any sort of relationships I get frustrated and call it out. In part, this stems from my own experience, because for awhile (and I still do go through phases like this) I felt that way, that everything just sucks no matter what you do because, as my friend's mom put it, "All women are kniving *****es."

While all women are kniving *****es, they do have redeeming qualities, and moreover, men can be just as kniving, so it only serves us right.

Many times I've stopped after reading a post in one of these threads and really thought about what someone has said, a lot of people here know something or other about how this stuff works. By no means am I the authority, and I'll never claim to be, but I give what input I can and I do everything I can to avoid letting someone get the misconception that every relationship sucks and is destined to end in hurt.

I like to say that I can learn something from everything and everyone.

I understand tantrums, it's all good man, I get really pissed plenty myself, and I'm sure everyone else does.

[Altiman94]

its easy to give advice about girls. I just say the same things.

[nab911]

Or not? A lot of chicks like their guy friends a bit more than just friends, but they never really admit directly to them. Moreover, the best relationships develop from friendships first.

True that....

[Q-less]

Dude...what are you waiting on. Show your affection...one evening after you are done doing whatever the two of you do all day, lean in and grab her thigh and pull her in while brushing her hair to the side breathing gently and slowly near her ear telling her how much fun you had together, then kiss her right under her ear. Grab her hand and walk her about 10 feet and turn around and just start planting them on her neck, cheeks, and lips (remember slowly and gently). Tell her how you feel and she will be overwhelmed with little tingles she will at least agree to a night cap...a late night cap. There is not a better relationship than one centered on intense emotions.

[Q-less]

Girls have enough friends...boyfriends/lovers are those who try a little harder and take risks. Don't wait for her first move...you probrably won't get it, and how much respect will she have for you afterwards if she has to show interest first. Just do it...do it to it.

[UncleBen]

Wow I didn't read all of this cause I didnt' figure people would keep posting in here, but anyway, here is an update.

She is still perfect

We don't talk on the phone *quite* as much, but its still alot. She enjoys it, and I truthfully do to.

We went out to Starbucks last night and I helped her do a project for school. We talked about alot of things, and it really was great.

I've gotten some good advice from this thread though, thanks for keeping it going everyone.

[SHIFT_Z]

Pictures, Ben... Pictures!!!

[absolute]

this is what you do, if you plan on being with her you have to actually make some progression toward being more than a friend, once your there your there. bet me and my girl kinda did the same thing, i met her was feeling her alot early cause we clicked so good, i talked to her every day till the wee hours, after about a week or two asked to go out she dedclined, i kept asking, and after about a month we went out and started really kicking it, i just started telling her how much of a ggod person i thought she was, and liked for her to stick around, and told her plainly i like you , but i dont wann be friend only i would like to progess to more, . weve been together a year now , and have all kindsa of fun, you cant be afraid of a ''no'', shh just do it

[UncleBen]

Thats good advice, I have actually already done alot of that. We talked about everything the other night when we were together; how we felt about each other, what we wanted out of the relationship, etc. Everything is looking very promising right now.

I found out she isnt' as perfect as I thought though. I got some devastating news last night. We talked about that for a long time as well and everything is cool, we are still together and wanting to move forward with each other, but it just really was a blow right to my heart to be honest. Sorry, no details though, haha.

Kevin, she is doing calendar girl this saturday and I will be getting pics of her then.

[Nismo_Freak]

YOU CAN DO IT!

[Twinchy]

good luck man hope everything goes great

[s13sr20chris]

wow, cant believe i made it this far. i must be getting soft. nope, i want other folks to find what i have. a wonderful wife.

1)chick dont like games(they can dish it out but not take it) on the first date with my wife(5 years ago) we were taking a romantic walk down the street and i ran into the woods to take a piss. made no sense at all. on our honeymoon just 7 months later she told me that she knew then that i was a straight shooter.

2)there is no oppposite sex friend. impossible but i cant prove it. if a chick wants to talk and all that friend stuff but not date she has you by the short hairs. she is getting emotional fulfillment(which is top priority for women) and you are checking her out and waiting for her to slip up and do whatever.

stay on the straight and narrow(in more than one sense of the word). any area where you slip up can and will be used against you should this last forever. thats just my experience and not written in stone.