how to post a "want to trade my ring for your car" ad...

[dickie]

Without sounding like a creep or a Nigerian scammer.

"Straight up: I have this engagement ring that was worth $x when I bought it, I want to trade for the car you are selling for considerably less than that amount if you are interested. Basically, I have been trying unsuccessfully to get rid of this beautiful symbol 1/5 of my lifespan up to this point being utterly wasted for the past 20 months or so... I think you might be able to do better than I have considering whenever I look at or handle this stunning and elegant piece of jewelry I have to start a 5 day whiskey and Everclear binge to remind myself that life is nothing more than a dirty inside joke between God and the Devil.

I feel like I would be much better off making your vehicle into a stylized instant-suicide machine than slowly killing my liver, kidneys and stomach lining. I have only one stipulation before I can consider what you have to offer: It must have at least 2 and no more than 4 wheels and move under its own power.

As long as this criteria is is met, you have shot at making some girl very happy. I wouldn't, however, recommend you actually let her keep the ring as it will lead to an almost instant detriment to your lifestyle. If I may, I suggest you simply find a target rich environment - mall, zoo, amusement park - and propose to anything that catches your eye. I'd estimate that armed with this ring you have an approximate 50% chance at scoring a companion for the night. Just make sure you ditch before she wakes up.

If that's not what you had in mind, I have been assured by several qualified parties that this exquisitely crafted piece of art will bring you more cash than that beater Datsun or Toyota you've had listed for months will. It's just a matter of how tired you are of watching it collect dust and email spam. If you don't feel motivated yet, show this ad to your wife or girlfriend and let her make the decision for you. Should this cause an argument between the two of you, please have her contact me ASAP."

Think I'll get flagged?

[Chaotic_Warlord]

Nice, I love it. I feel your pain brother.

[Mr1der]

fail for not wanting more than 4 wheels.

[Dattebayo]

SO why don't you just sell the ring?

[PapaSmurf2k3]

SO why don't you just sell the ring?

not sure, but if I had to guess, I'd say the broad might get a portion of the money if that were the case?

[snwbrdr435]

^ he already tried that

[PoorManQ45]

I LOL'ed

[dickie]

ha. im not being serious at all, i just noticed that most people trying to trade ANYTHING for a car on CL are scammers with redring'ed 360's or stolen electronics and jewelry. there's not really a way around sounding like some kind of scum to a seller when you are trying to get rid of a ring

[gwoods]

I have either this mad tyt JDM camber mobile from a previous thread



OR

this drawing of a spider





Let me know!

[Beancooker]

Chris, that is awesome! I love it!!!

[IanS]

This thread is worthless without pix.

That is all..

[MinisterofDOOM]

fail for not wanting more than 4 wheels.

Deuce and a half. :fistpumping:

[dickie]

ah, one of the cars i really wanted just sold yesterday. early 71 Z with a driveway full of spares. i need to sell this damn thing so i can have nice cars

[HashiriyaS14]

not sure, but if I had to guess, I'd say the broad might get a portion of the money if that were the case?

^^
I cannot imagine that is the case.

It's just hard to sell jewelry and get anything close to real value. Unlike, say, a vehicle, jewelry is easy to fake and people are understandably untrustworthy.

[dickie]

the broad in question is out of the picture for good.

[gwoods]

the broad in question is out of the picture for good.

omg YOU KILLED HER????

[dickie]

I tell people she's dead, that's all you need to know

[greencar]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RpRmf9xXH7A