Funniest story about yourself

Post by **ricebike** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

once upon a time when i was a service writer for *******,

I wrote up a flat tire repair for this young hot girl & his father. Some of the mechanics are in the shop wanting to look in & rate her 1-10. One of those smartasses got an aerosole can of windshield glass cleaner <the foaming kind>

he stood @ the glass door, separating the waiting room from the shop area, looking @ her sitting there next to her father, simulating a Handjob, then spraying that foam cleaner all over the door.

Geez, I turned red & laugh out loud for a few min <other people in the waiting room, including her dad, bellowed out w/ me>, but that wasn't professional @ all...

One of my coworkers had to go out there & tell the mech that the father is sitting next to her when he pulled the "prank" He dissapeared til the job was done & they were out the door.

Hmm, good times:fruit

Post by **Mr1der** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

colies97~240sx wrote:I'll leave the drunken stories for another time... but one time I bit some random dude on the shoulder in Barnes and Noble...

We were at the mall and I was super tired and just wanted to go home but my ex insisted on going into Barnes and Noble to look at magazines. K, fine whatever... I followed him in, going around circles past rack after rack of magazines, not paying attention to much of anything, I was just kinda spaced out... then, for some unknown reason to me... I guess just to mess with him I decided to bite him on the shoulder... which would have been fine if I would have bit him. Once I bit whoever’s shoulder it was I realized that it wasn’t my ex, it wasn’t his shirt, and it’s some random dude looking at mags!!!! Oddly enough, and I don't even know how, but the dude didn't flinch, it’s like he didn't notice, I guess he thought I was his girlfriend biting him or something or I just ran away too fast to see his reaction. I ran up to my ex freakin out saying I gotta get outta here, I gotta get outta here, over and over until I dragged him out...

k, maybe it’s not that funny, just odd... lol :crazy

freak.

Post by **Dattebayo** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

vamp.

Post by **jdmfreak** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

LOL! Funny ****.

Anyway me and a friend were watching a tape with a movie and some Anime on it. Well he didnt want to watch the movie so I was fast forwarding to the anime movie. Turns out, at the end of the movie I had also recorded the first 5 or so minutes of Shock Video. I was like, WTF is this? My friend said, "Who cares? Let watch this instead." So about 2 minutes into the show they show this naked girl on a bed with her legs spread open. All of a sudden without warning she put her hands on her crotch and squeezed a whole ****in pickle/cucumber right out of her ****in *****. It was so random so we just bust out laughing as I rewound and played it over and over. I guess my little brother who was either 9 or 10 at the time, decided to see what all the commotion was about. We were laughing so much that we didnt even hear him. As soon as I saw him it was immediate silence. I explained it to him what the situation was and somehow he believed it. I mean he didnt even ask for proof like he usually does when I do questionble **** like that.

CLASSIC.

Post by **Anand** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

2nrchic wrote:I was with my ex-boyfriend, and we had just gotten done w/ somethin, so we were just bein silly and ticklin eachother or whatever, and I see one of those compressed gas duster bottle things that are full of CO2 (I think?). Well, he sprayed it on my leg, and iced real fast then evaporated, and it was cold as hell! So me, bein all daring and tryin to be be funny, said, "spray it on my nipple, it will make it hard!"...bad idea...that b***h stung for 5 days...and he wouldn't even let me do it back to him!

omghi2u

so, how youuuu doiiinnn???

lol

that is the funny!!

Post by **rousie13** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

Black240 wrote:omghi2u

so, how youuuu doiiinnn???

lol

that is the funny!!

You want her to try that on you, don't ya??

Post by **Anand** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

rousie13 wrote:You want her to try that on you, don't ya??

actually, umm.. on a second though.. I won't say what I want!

Post by **Mr1der** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

make sure to turn the can upside down.

Post by **rousie13** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

Black240 wrote:actually, umm.. on a second though.. I won't say what I want!

haha....god only knows what your thinking

Post by **supra brit** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

whoa...:icesangel

Post by **Anand** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

2nrchic wrote:whoa...:icesangel

there you are.. I was wonderring when you would chime in! haha

so whadoyasay? when you coming to Southern Cali?

Post by **supra brit** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

lol...why do u want me 2 come to socal?

Post by **Anand** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

haha... cuz you are funny as hell and the hotness! oh and I like the whole Co2 trick!! lol

Post by **jdmfreak** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

Stupid heads.

Post by **I30T** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

Recently. We were sitting around a friends house, and some more people called and said they were coming over. these were 8-9 more people in addition to the 4 we already had. Well, we convinced one guy to answer the door with just a wife beater and a trucker hat on, and hold a bottle in his hand and tell them that she couldn't have any more visitors. Some of the people just go who the hell? and ****, that guy doesn't have pants on. meanwhile im in the bushes cracking up, recording their reactions on camera. He goes "y'all better git the f(ck out my proper-taaay rat nayaw!" Their lives were never the same.

it was comic genius.

Post by **Mr1der** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

hey Anand, when'd you decide to change your name? threw me off, I was like "we have too guys named Anand now?" not as common as James knowhatimsayin?

Post by **jdmfreak** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

Hey you gotta post the vid.

Post by **Anand** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

Mr1der wrote:hey Anand, when'd you decide to change your name? threw me off, I was like "we have too guys named Anand now?" not as common as James knowhatimsayin?

haha.. i know what you're saying.. I have been thinking to change it for a long time but never actually got it done. Yesterday I figured it was a perfect day to do it...

Post by **supra brit** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

thanks anand...but ive learned my lesson...no more co2...but ice cubes work too haha jk

Post by **rousie13** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

2nrchic wrote:thanks anand...but ive learned my lesson...no more co2...but ice cubes work too haha jk

haha....so kinky :ylsuper

Post by **supra brit** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

lol, not at all!

Post by **Mr1der** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

yeah, now if she said frozen grapes jammed into 6 different holes, then that'd be kinky.

Post by **supra brit** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

hahaha!!! is that 1 of ur fantasies 1der?

Post by **jdmfreak** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

OMG! ROTFLMAO!!!

Post by **supra brit** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

oh you thought that was funny huh?

Checkered-Member · Post by **Checkered-Member** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

I30T wrote:Recently. We were sitting around a friends house, and some more people called and said they were coming over. these were 8-9 more people in addition to the 4 we already had. Well, we convinced one guy to answer the door with just a wife beater and a trucker hat on, and hold a bottle in his hand and tell them that she couldn't have any more visitors. Some of the people just go who the hell? and ****, that guy doesn't have pants on. meanwhile im in the bushes cracking up, recording their reactions on camera. He goes "y'all better git the f(ck out my proper-taaay rat nayaw!" Their lives were never the same.

it was comic genius.

ROFL

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH....OMG...breath....

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Post by **jdmfreak** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

Yea 1ders stupid comments are usually funny. Im quite sure what he told you was only one of the 2821283747327458 fantasies in his head.

Post by **Mr1der** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

2nrchic wrote:hahaha!!! is that 1 of ur fantasies 1der?

it's not the reason for a bag of grapes in my freezer! honest!

Post by **supra brit** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

I've heard it with cherries...but grapes? hmm...

Post by **Anand** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 4:14 pm

2nrchic wrote:I've heard it with cherries...but grapes? hmm...

I can make the cherries happen if that's what you want!

Funniest story about yourself

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