Doubt!

[frapjap]

I would kill this woman if I were in a relationship with her, let alone a marriage.
While I've got nothing to hide, I shouldn't have to prove it.
Thats a complete and utter lack of trust for her man on her end.
Hopefully he has an iron-clad prenup.



http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/artic ... Brick.html


I snoop on my man's emails because I don't trust other women, says Samantha Brick
By Samantha Brick
PUBLISHED: 19:20 EST, 9 July 2012 | UPDATED: 03:00 EST, 10 July 2012

Samantha Brick, with husband Pascal, admits that she checks her husbands emails and phone messages
My personal safe is bolted to the floor in my office.

Within it, among the passports and birth certificates, is a notepad containing all the passwords for my husband’s phone and email accounts.
To be honest, I don’t really need to glance at the combinations of numbers and letters in that book any more: I know each and every security code off by heart.
For, as far as I’m concerned, my husband’s emails, voicemails and texts aren’t just his business — they’re mine, too.
I read, listen and check all of them daily. And I don’t mind admitting that I open his post, too.
While you might be appalled, let me say I'd never consider my actions as spying or the desperate efforts of a paranoid wife. In fact, I consider it to be protecting my marriage.
It’s not that I don’t trust my husband, Pascal — I do. I just don’t trust other women.
So I applauded Jools Oliver’s honesty — and agreed with her actions completely — when she admitted at the weekend that she did the same to her husband Jamie.
Asked if she felt confident about his dealings with other women, she said: 'Yeah, I’ll check his emails. I’ll check his Twitter.

'I’ll check his phone. Everything seems fine. He says I’m a jealous girl, but I think I’m fairly laid back considering.'
I’ve had dealings with Jools: I worked with her briefly when I was head of entertainment at Sky 1 in 2000.

She was not yet a mother, and I found her to be a very smart woman in possession of a razor-sharp wit, who cut to the chase in every conversation we had.
She is neither self-doubting nor questioning of Jamie’s commitment to her.

Anyone who writes her off as an insecure housewife does so at their peril.
It’s my belief that she could have had a broadcasting career to equal Jamie’s.

Yet she chose to stay at home and raise her family instead. I, too, take the domestic side of my life, and my marriage, seriously. I’m a wife first and part-time writer second.
I have two words to say to those women who dismiss Jools and me for being insecure and not trusting our other halves: Vernon Kay.
In February 2010, TV presenter Kay admitted to his wife, Strictly Come Dancing host Tess Daly, that he had exchanged ‘racy’ text messages with five women, including a glamour model he had met in a nightclub.
According to Kay, the messages started off as ‘pretty innocent’ before becoming explicit. At the time, Tess, rightly in my opinion, responded: ‘The trust is gone.’
My experience has shown me there are scores of women who are morally bankrupt when it comes to using every form of modern communication available to snare an already taken man.
Men seem to have no idea about how pitifully easily they can be trapped by unscrupulous women hell bent on hooking any chap they fancy.
Unfortunately, emails, texts and messaging on social networks allow women to try their luck with men who would normally be off-limits.

Jools Oliver admitted that she checks Jamie's emails, Twitter account and mobile phone to make sure no other women are in touch with her husband
The flirting options are endless: a ‘poke’ on Facebook, a suggestive re-tweet on Twitter, a saucy message on email or text.
Forget exchanging longing looks over the coffee machine or lingering over the tea trolley — these exchanges are accomplished within seconds (though the dire consequences can last much longer).
The fact is that women are brilliant communicators: we excel at composing flirty one-liners and sending carefully worded ‘friendly’ messages to members of the opposite sex.
And that’s why every morning the first thing I do on waking, after checking my voicemail and emails, is to check my husband’s messages. When I scan through his emails, I scrutinise his inbox for female names. When I find them, I’ll open the message and run through the text, casting a beady eye over how they sign off.

Vernon Kay admitted to wife Tess Daly that he had sent racy messages to Rhian Sugden
Most are work emails, but if it’s personal, I’ll print it off and ask him who the person is. There’s always been an innocent explanation and now, perhaps unsurprisingly, such messages rarely arrive.
But that wasn’t always the case — hence my keeping a close eye on the situation. When I moved in with my husband, he had been single for 18 months. Yet the moment he was off the market, other women saw him as a challenge they couldn’t resist.
One persisted in phoning our home, usually after ‘wine o’clock’. Her slurred voice and drunken pleas to speak to Pascal made me question whether he was telling the truth — that there had never been anything between them.
My husband — in typical male style — didn’t want to take the calls, preferring to ignore them and hope she’d stop calling. So it was left to me to make contact with this person’s closest friend, suggesting she should have a discreet word with her drunk-dialling friend.
We were also dealing with a former girlfriend of his who, on learning Pascal was in love, decided to bombard him with cards, love letters and pictures of herself (we live in France where such ‘jealous’ and ‘possessive’ declarations of love are considered the norm).
If that wasn’t bad enough, there were also crude and explicit text messages which, perhaps predictably, arrived late at night. We’d normally have no choice but to turn off the phone.
Four years on, such crude messages no longer arrive and I consider myself happily married.
But of late, we’ve spent increasing amounts of time apart as I’ve been back and forth to Britain helping my mother look after my grandmother, who requires round-the-clock care.
While I trust my husband, and he has no objection to my scouring his communications, it still doesn’t stop me from checking his phone on my return. Pascal isn’t the most technologically savvy person and so, in the time it takes for him to make me a cup of tea, I’ll whizz through the call history on his mobile phone.
And if there are any numbers I don’t recognise, I’ll do what any sane woman should do: I’ll ring up and check exactly who it is.
More...I check Jamie's emails and phone to make sure he's not cheating, says Jools Oliver
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It’s always a supplier or customer (Pascal is a carpenter), but checking puts my mind at rest.
As the number of texts I have received from my husband during our five years together can be counted on one hand, I know it’s utterly unlikely he’ll be sending text messages to anyone else. Even so, that doesn’t prevent me from checking to see if he is in receipt of any.
Recently, there’s been a spate of texts that suggested they were from another woman — urging Pascal to text a number to receive a photograph of her.



'While I trust my husband, he has no objection to me scouring his communications'
At first, my mind went to places I’d rather it hadn’t, but I soon realised it was a money-making con by some texting racket that had chanced on his number — if you text back, it costs you a fortune.
Of course, that conclusion wasn’t reached before the message had triggered a row of epic proportions.
I don’t think my approach is possessive — rather it’s eminently practical. I also believe openness and transparency in marriage is the key to such a relationship thriving.
Consequently, my husband and I don’t harbour secrets, neither do we have clandestine accounts, undeclared mobile phones or belong to any of the myriad online social networks.
Just as I check up on him, my email account is on his computer and I’ve written down all of my passwords and security codes for him, too.
I don’t, as recommended by a friend, keep back ten per cent in our relationship. It’s all or nothing — and that’s why, when my husband or I are on the phone or writing letters to other people, we do it in front of each other. We don’t have anything to hide.
For anyone who thinks I’m overly suspicious, consider this: a married friend of my husband has recently bought a pay-as-you-go mobile phone for his own ‘independence’.
It’s no coincidence that he has also struck up a friendly camaraderie with a local waitress, too.
That, in my opinion, is all the justification that women like Jools and me need to keep tabs on our husbands.

[hudy]

Doesn't mention if she allows him to do the same to her. I would guess not. Her "suspicion" of other women leads me to believe she has been the offender at least once.
I agree, I also have nothing to hide but would not condone this behavior.

[NolimitZ32]

If I was Wayne Brady I would choke this b****.

[Mr1der]

have you searched "honey trap" yet?

[OriginalWheelman]

Bottom line,anyone who says "I trust him, I don't trust her." has no trust for the other person. My wife is into cars, video games, and computers. No surprise she has lots of guy friends. I trust her. I don't have any of her passwords unless she gave them to me. I can't count the times she has come home and said "another one of my friends professed their love for me today." I don't need to keep tabs on her, and I'm not threatened by them because I know she loves me. That trust is the foundation of our relationship. I don't see how anyone can have a relationship without it.

Furthermore, she seems to me like a sexist. "Men seem to have no idea about how pitifully easily they can be trapped by unscrupulous women hell bent on hooking any chap they fancy." So we're ll stupid an oblivious? Make this statement about women and there would be women lined up to picket you. And then all the comments about how she calls people JUST because she doesn't recognize the number, and instead of allowing her husband to ignore the wino €into leaving him alone, seeks outher friends to tell her to stop. There's a word for people like her in America, Psyco-b****.

The only thing I see coming from this total destruction of his individuality is an eventual defiance of her control, in an effort to regain some semblance of self outside of this relationship. Control of this nature can even be considered psychological abuse. I love how she justifies this crazy behavior by citing one example of someone who's husband did just that. Got his own phone, and builds a relationship with a waitress.

For anyone who thinks I’m overly suspicious, consider this: a married friend of my husband has recently bought a pay-as-you-go mobile phone for his own ‘independence’.
It’s no coincidence that he has also struck up a friendly camaraderie with a local waitress, too.
That, in my opinion, is all the justification that women like Jools and me need to keep tabs on our husbands.

Rather than seeing it as a reaction to oppressive treatment, she uses it as justification. Welcome friends, to a self fulfilling prophecy. And since when the f*** is poking someone on Facebook suspicious? My sister poked me the other day, does that mean she wants to move to banjo country and raise wierdo kids? No, she's just indicating she is thinking about me.

Bottom line, no matter what crazy delusions she needs to convince herself she isn't controlling him, she is. There are two possible outcomes in my opinion.
1. Her husband will be a spineless wimp and put up with it, while it erodes his self esteem and he lives his life subservient to her.
2. He gets sick of it, tries to establish some sort of relationship where he can has some sort of freedom.
Number two is the likely outcome, which is bad for her, but she will view as validation, and neither are good for him.

Dude needs to run.

[nissangirl74]

I know lots of women like this and their behavior just baffles me. This is the type of woman who will hook up with a guy and then devise ways to "change" him and mold him into someone she can love / train / control. Such s***. This woman needs to get dumped. Not because her man finds another woman to treat him better, but because she isn't good wife material. I'd rather live my life alone than being spied on all the time. Eff that. Jealousy has no place in a committed relationship. I know there are a lot of cheaters out there but there's no way I could / would live like that.

[alphapig]

Wow!

I will use a favorite line from Dr. Drew, one that I wish I followed in the past:

"Less history, more mystery."

[dirtyNXerchickie]

my father treated me like that. eventually i got so tired of "behaving," i snapped. i say remove dead weight.

[s0m3th1ngAZ]

Crazy bishez.

[Bubba1]

I know lots of women like this and their behavior just baffles me. This is the type of woman who will hook up with a guy and then devise ways to "change" him and mold him into someone she can love / train / control. Such bullsh*t. This woman needs to get dumped. Not because her man finds another woman to treat him better, but because she isn't good wife material. I'd rather live my life alone than being spied on all the time. Eff that. Jealousy has no place in a committed relationship. I know there are a lot of cheaters out there but there's no way I could / would live like that.

That behavior doesn't baffle me as much as the other guy/girl that willingly tolerates the invasion of privacy long term. I know a few mistrustful women like that and a common theme I noticed was that they felt hurt badly by a previous relationship and vowed never to get hurt again. It's certainly not a healthy attitude for a successful relationship. But then again, there are many pathetic, desperate, naiive losers out there (cough like Nala cough) who'd probably be willing to accept a sick relationship like that in exchange for sex.

[frapjap]

Crazy bishez.

Fantastic!

[MinisterofDOOM]

The real root of this problem is that she has no self-respect. She's jealous of everyone because she feels worthless. And she feels worthless because she's an untrustworthy scumbag. And she knows that she's an untrustworthy scumbag, and feels that everyone else in the world must be as well. So she sees everyone else as a threat. And those threats are too much for her to bear, because she has no self respect and feels worthless.



I don't understand why anyone would put up with this. Male or female. I'd be out in two seconds flat. I'm a straighforward person. If you're going to accuse me of malicious subterfuge, you'd better have some damn good evidence. And feeling threatened isn't evidence. It's weakness.

[AppleBonker]

Again, MoD, I like your train of thought. I would agree completely if I thought the article was legit. If the author honestly relayed all of this information, you'd be spot on.

However, she is clearly trolling. And doing a fantastic job of it. Probably one of the best acts of trolling I've ever seen. Read the rest of her articles for DM (here) and I doubt there is any other conclusion that can be reached. It is very lol-worthy.

[themadscientist]

The b****'s s*** would be on the curb immediately. I am my wife's partner, not her possession, same for her. This woman is poison and I pity any man who has so little respect for himself that he would allow this activity. The really funny part is when he cheats on her it will be because she drove him to the other girl with her s***. The first time a girl shows him some trust and caring he's gone. This woman will then say "I knew it!" Yeah, we knew it too, you psycho.

[IanS]

I work very closely with a guy in a similar situation.

He is 22 and his girlfriend is 18. She is pregnant, and they live together at her fathers house.

He originally moved into her house after 2 months of dating because she didn't trust him. Why he didn't run then I have no clue.

They fight endlessly. She is so bi-polar its painful to watch, and he puts up with it. He can be sooo mad one minute because she is being absolutely insane. The next minute they are all happy. It can go back and forth 4 times in 2 hours. It can't be healthy.

She drives by the shop 3 or 4 times a day at least. If his truck changes parking spots, or turns around in its spot, she will drop by and give him the 3rd degree for 10 minutes. Asking who the other girl is. If his truck isn't there entirely (running to get parts or food or what have you). She will blow up both his phone and the shop phone.

If he doesn't respond to a text sent by her within a few minutes, she flies off the handle, often showing up at the shop to yell at him. Its like watching a train wreck in slow motion. Its bad for business and bad for him. If I had the authority to fire him, I would. I have chewed her out on more then one occasion for disrupting work. She destracts him, and its a matter of time before it causes him to make a major mistake.

The best part is, he has never cheated on her. Her on the other hand can claim no such thing. She slept with a guy from her highschool a few months back (before she was pregnant), and he didn't leave. She actually admitted to it, then proceeded to blame it on him, for not paying enough attention to her.

She needs clinical help, and so does he. I feel bad for the kid most of all. He is going to get so screwed up.

Having said all this, I will be sure to report back when one of them ends up dead. Sooner or later he is going to snap and throttle her. I'd have done it months ago.

[OriginalWheelman]

Two words for that guy. Paternity Test.

[Bubba1]

Two words for that guy. Paternity Test.

Three more words. "The Maury Show." This is exactly the type of people that commonly appear on daytime shlock shows like Maury, Springer, or Steve Wilkos. (Steeeeeeeeeeeeve!!!!!!!!!)"

[IanS]

Two words for that guy. Paternity Test.

That's what I said.

[themadscientist]

Werd. Teach the guy the not yo baby dance.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v9D7N--FyQw[/youtube]

[Gold Digger]

My neighbor is kind of in the same boat. He's 41, she's 29. Both divorcees from f'ed up marriages. He has two kids from his previous, she has one and they now have one together. It's a fail-fest with these two and I wonder how they've stayed together this long...then I figured it out. The wife.

She was damaged pretty badly from her marriage, mostly due to her naivety at marrying so young. Ex was an older guy in his mid 30's, she was 18 when they married, kid arrived a year later. She was a stay at home mom, he worked as a suit for a company and was always out til at least 10:30pm every night "having drinks with co-workers."

Well, that wasn't too far off from the truth. The co-workers were mostly females, and the drinks happened at a love hotel, along with other extra curricular activities. He ended up just leaving her with nothing.

So, she took that experience and basically controls her currents husband every move. He can't go anywhere by himself. If I invite him to my friends bar with me, it's ok, but if any of his co-workers at his hospital (he's an X-ray tech) invite him, it's a no-go.

They also have the exact same phones and she sets the passwords so she can check his phone daily. If he asks to see hers, she gets all defensive and says what's on her phone is private, but that argument is only a one-way street. Doesn't work for him.

Honestly, I have my problems with my wife, but honesty and trust aren't any of them. We have a pretty transparent relationship now. She knows I have a couple of female friends that I usually drink with at my friends bar, but she knows them and also knows that when I'm at my friends bar, he's making sure that everyone is being "good" LOL.