Why Republicans are Awesome

[Cold_Zero]

This one is for Telco..

Game On

The Democratic faithful on Capitol Hill have had plenty to boast about recently, with special-election wins in the Deep South and legislative victories over President Bush on key domestic issues.

But it's been eight years since they had anything to cheer about on the baseball diamond -- until Thursday night.

That's right, late in the annual Congressional Baseball Game, the Democrats took a 4-3 lead and appeared on the verge of their first victory over their Republican rivals since 2000. Buoyed by an optimism rooted in their new majority status on the Hill -- and a presidential nominee-in-waiting who's ahead in most polls -- the Democratic fans began to believe. "Yes, we can!" the Democratic crowd thundered, echoing the campaign slogan of Barack Obama.

In the bottom of the sixth inning, Rep. Joe Baca (Calif.), the wily 61-year-old pitcher for the Democrats, tired and surrendered five runs, giving the GOP a commanding 8-4 lead heading into the last frame of the seven-inning game. But the Democrats rallied again, keyed by a pair of two-run singles by Baca and Rep. Adam Smith (Wash.), giving the Democrats a 10-8 lead with the Republicans' last at-bats approaching.

Rep. Mike Doyle (Pa.), the Democratic manager, removed Baca in favor of Rep. Bart Stupak (Mich.) to try to close out the game. But Stupak proved wild, and soon the bases were filled with Republicans. Using the game's liberal multiple-substitution rules, Doyle sent Baca back out to the mound. (The Fix would have to consult official baseball scoring manuals to determine if this would have given Baca the chance for both the win and the save.)

After a wild pitch made the score 10-9, the Democrats chose to load the bases, looking for a game-ending double play. Sure enough, Baca cleanly fielded a one-hopper hit straight to him, pivoted and threw to home, where Rep. Chris Murphy (Conn.), the freshman Democratic catcher, fielded the ball and tagged home plate. Two outs. Murphy looked down the first base line and had a clear shot to throw out the GOP runner, Rep. Connie Mack (Fla.), for the double play.

Then, disaster struck for the long-suffering Democrats. Murphy's throw sailed high above the first baseman and deep down the right field line. One Republican runner scored, and then Rep. Adam Putnam (Fla.), who started the play on first, scurried home with the winning run. Republicans prevailed, 11-10.

"The Democrats deserved to win the game," Rep. Zach Wamp (Tenn.), the Republican shortstop who had two hits, told the Roll Call newspaper, the sponsor of the game. "I've played for 12 years, and this was the best baseball game I've played in."

Congressional Baseball Game... and the Republicans have won every game since 2000. bud

[rn79870]

No surprises here, the Republicans are better at switch hitting.

Now, if we could just get a few to sign on with the Padres.

[srellim234]

Sounds like after the Chamber of Commerce public relations nightmare the congressman did a good job of burying the post game $10,000 bar tab in an appropriations earmark so the taxpayers wouldn't see it.

[skylndrftr]

ooooohhhh puleeeeez...

its just because they insist on a dont't ask don't tell policy regarding bat corking!

[Marenta]

What you don't know about is how they were all juicin' and how their dealers were the Republican's aides..

[AZhitman]

No surprises here, the Republicans are better at switch hitting.

I thought most gays were Libbies?

This one is easy: Liberals throw like girls. They don't eat red meat, they don't lift heavy things, they don't like to "keep score", and they don't want there to be a winner and a loser.

Yay baseball!

p.s. ^ All typed with tongue in cheek and in good fun.

[heliochrome85]

Yay baseball!

all i can say is wow. Wow. i never understood baseball, never will. Give me the womens singles final at wimbledon over baseball anyday. Nothing like watching women who could kill you with a tennis ball, to get you all hot and bothered in the mornin'.

[stopcamping]

Im pretty sure most closeted gays are republicans.

[AZhitman]

all i can say is wow. Wow. i never understood baseball, never will.

I understand it, just not a big fan. I'm a die-hard football fanatic.

[nismofly]

Im pretty sure ...

im pretty sure the only thing worse than baseball is drag racing

[skylndrftr]

all i can say is wow. Wow. i never understood baseball, never will. Give me the womens singles final at wimbledon over baseball anyday. Nothing like watching women who could kill you with a tennis ball, to get you all hot and bothered in the mornin'.

There is only one palce I want to see woman grunting...and its not while playing tennigs...

[wingFeather]

im pretty sure the only thing worse than baseball is drag racing

I'm guessing you've never built a race car & won a championship. It's quite fun. You're not supposed to watch baseball or racing - they are better as participant sports

[heliochrome85]

on the can?

[Soravia]

that's because Dems play basketball. Look at Obama. He can jump!

[skylndrftr]

im pretty sure the only thing worse than baseball is drag racing

im pretty sure the only thing worse than baseball is drag racing

NASCARWomens golfTelevised chesssynchronized swimmingSOLO synchronized swimming...

[nismofly]

i will watch NASCAR 24 hours a day before i sit through a baseball game or any drag racing

the other stuff just doesnt count

[Eikon]

No surprises here, the Republicans are better at switch hitting.

At least the Rep. play for the right team!

[srellim234]

Republicans better at switch hitting? Is that another Larry Craig joke?

[skylndrftr]

Republicans better at switch hitting? Is that another Larry Craig joke?

WRONG SMILEY!!!!

::searches::...

damnit Greg I need a wide stance smiley!

[ishkabibble]

Did they have to hire extra security to make sure Foley, Craig, etc. stayed away from the ball boys?

[rn79870]

[Marenta]

Wow.. I'm not even sure this is right.. Or.. I mean Left.. Left! DAMNIT LEFT!

[telcoman]

LOL that you think of me?

Its a shame the republicians don't perform as well in our government affairs.

Telcoman

[Cold_Zero]

I thought you would like the story... and yes I thought immediately of you when I read it.