Realizing that Brooks and Dunn were breaking up and doing their farewell tour, I decided to buy tickets. Closest show was in Oklahoma City as I'd missed the one here in St Louis just two weeks earlier.
I paid $240 for all three tickets and the three of us (me, Ian, my brother) embarked on a journey, leaving town at 8:30p.
Construction on I-44 in MO brought traffic to a crawl, wasting at least 45 minutes. This Prius is... unusual. The stickers read "Environmentalism is the new McCarthyism" and "Bring back capitalism"
Stopped at a McD's in some tiny little town. I wanted to eat at Wendy's but Ian got confused by a roundabout like a typical American and took us on a detour down a dark state road. I yelled at him, he finally turned around, and he then decided that instead of going to Wendys, he was going to get back on the highway.
Their angus burger is terribly mediocre.
We got stuck again in Tulsa, waiting for a slow-moving train after leaving a gas station. It went forward, then back, then forward, then back, before finally settling on a spot 15 minutes later when we could cross the tracks.
Stopped at Whataburger on Meridian Street. Not bad.
Through Travelocity, I booked a nice Wyndham Garden in Oklahoma City for $60 including tax. Added $40 for a 6pm checkout since we arrived at 6:30am.
Well, the extra $40 was a f***ing waste because housekeeping kept knocking on my door and even came in and turned on the lights once. Kenneth at the front desk had the nerve to call me at 1pm...
*RING RING RING* (hotel phones ring in the most obnoxious way)
Me: 'WHAT DO YOU WANT!'
Kenneth: "Uhh, its 1pm."
Me: So?'
Kenneth: "Checkout is at 11am."
Me: 'Listen, I got here late last night and paid extra so I could sleep in and be left alone.'
Kenneth: "Did they charge your card?"
Me: 'YES THEY DID THEY CHARGED ME FORTY BUCKS'
Kenneth: "Hold on let me look here... [typing sounds] okay I see the charge."
[silence... and no apology... so I interjected]
Me: 'LISTEN KENNETH, I PAID EXTRA SO I COULD HAVE SOME PEACE AND QUIET. YOU PEOPLE KEEP KNOCKING AND COMING INTO MY ROOM AND TURNING ON MY LIGHTS AND CALLING ME WHEN ALL I WANT TO DO IS GET SOME F***ING SLEEP. LEAVE ME THE F*** ALONE.'
I then hung up. I don't know how I avoided making threats of violence. I'm extremely unpleasant when disturbed from sleep.
I hung up and tried to go back to bed, but all the anger made it impossible for me to doze off again. I was stuck in this zombie-like state where my mind was too active to doze off but I was still physically dead tired.
When I get only a few hours of sleep, my nose runs all day, my left knee hurts (car accident a couple years back) and I'm cranky as hell. I wanted to march down to the front desk and punch someone in the face, but they lucked out because I was in too much pain to march.
The room was really nice though. When I checked out after cooling down a bit and taking a shower, they apologized and gave me a refund.
I dont think Ive seen a real cordless phone since high school.
We loaded into the Jeep and went to Walgreens where I purchased ibuprofen, gatorade, and a knee bandage. Its $20 I could have avoided spending had I been able to just get some sleep.
The Wrangler is reasonably comfy, though quite thirsty on fuel at 70mph. The seats are soft but supportive and I felt great. My brother, unfortunately, was stuck with the little bench seat in the back. Fortunately, he was able to just lay down and sleep. Lots of wind noise, but whatever. I'm used to driving with the top down 99% of the time anyway.
Headed 4 miles down I-40 to the Ford Center. Parking was dirt cheap, only $6 to be right next to the stadium AND right next to the highway on-ramp for an easy escape.
OKC is a decent town. Friendly but lots of poverty. Pleasant enough though.
This building on 1100 South Robinson says "This is it... 1100 South Robinson". It gives no further explanation as to what the hell its purpose is.
A section of downtown called "Automobile Alley" has some vintage dealerships and a Hudson-Essex building still in tact.
Beer time.
30 minutes to showtime. The crowd was a mix of smoking hot Oklahoma girls and some farmer types.
I told my brother I'd give him $5 if he could find a black person. He found two... shining shoes. It made me slightly uncomfortable, but its honest work.
Tyler d!ck opened with 3 or 4 songs, then Miranda Lambert came on stage.
She closed with "Kerosene" and exited. Time to get more beer.
Kix and Ronnie appeared and the energy went up to 11.
This was going to be their final tour.
lol
My brother and I were terribly out of place. I think they just assumed we were Mexicans.
Ronnie is starting to age. Still has an amazing voice.
Four members of the US military marched on stage during "Only In America". The crowd (self included) went ape-s*** with excitement.
Red, white, and blue streamers were released into the audience.
The tour is appropriately called "The Last Rodeo". Their set list went in reverse chronological order, ending with their 1991 hit, "Brand New Man". I knew every word to every song.
Left Oklahoma and headed for Wichita where Ian swapped the Jeep with his brother for an LS430. I hoped to get to St Louis the same night but Ian was tired and unable to drive further, so we three ended up in a Motel 6.
It was clean. Unfortunately, the extra night away from home meant I was paying not only for the cost of the Motel 6 but also an additional night for my dog who was in a doggy hotel back home.
Upon arriving, we went for some authentic late-night Mexican food. IT WAS EPIC.
Had an afternoon breakfast and swapped cars.
Well, its a Lexus. Unfortunately, the interior quality declined a bit since the LS400.
Let me sum up this 2004 LS430 briefly: Its like sitting in a waiting room. You aren't driving, you're just sitting there hanging out, waiting for time to pass until you reach your destination. The suspension is firmer than the LS400, but the intake and exhaust make absolutely NO sound. It really is the pinnacle of Lexus's philosophy, so if you're into that, nothing compares. For the rest of us, blech. Its a car designed for people who think driving is a chore, not a privilege. I work from home and go out at night to drive around for pleasure, and I intentionally choose classes at satellite campuses far from home so I can drive MORE. So no, I don't want to block out the motoring experience. The seats in the LS430 were also less comfortable than the LS400. The old LS400 had soft spring-supported seat bottoms and pillow soft head rests you could easily sleep on. The LS430 tried to be more German, but didn't do it as well. Its an EXCELLENT car, no question, but I just don't give a sh*t.
While in Wichita I got a phone call from a leasing agent at my complex telling me that the music in my place was too loud. I thought she was referring to Ian's obnoxious late-night listening sessions where he will sometimes turn James Blunt and Coldplay up to annoying volumes. Nope, she was talking about the Optimus receiver/amplifier in my living room that has a habit of switching to 98.1 FM and playing at a VERY LOUD volume when there's a power outage or power surge. Its like the car from the movie Christine. The damn thing is haunted.
It apparently happened at 1am the night before and had carried on for 16 solid hours. My neighbors thought I was having a crazy party. They banged on the door several times but since no one was home, no one answered, figuring I was just being a d!ck and ignoring them. I cost them valuable sleep and felt terrible about it, especially considering how much I myself need a good night's rest to function. Realizing it was my phantom stereo, I called back the leasing office and told them I was out of town and asked them to unlock the door, go in, and turn it off.
I went here to pick up three gift baskets totaling $140.
On the plus side, I got to meet the very friendly and understanding neighbors. One was a hot mom.
The guy with the wall adjacent to the speakers got the biggest basket.
Some doughnuts.
Some saturated fat.
HOLY CRAP SOMEONE ACTUALLY BOUGHT A LINCOLN BLACKWOOD
And that concludes my trip.
Costs:
Tickets: $240
Lodging: $125
Gas: $180
Food: Probably $70
Dog hotel: $150
Overpriced Stadium Beer: $60
Brooks and Dunn t-shirts: $90
Being the brown man at a cowboy music show: Priceless
