Go here, its the AFC NEO wiring manual.Go to page 25, you are using the S14 6/1996-12/1998. ECU terminal drawing N3-a.
Go to page 28 where you will find N3-a. An interesting thing will happen when you take you ecu, and turn it right side up. All of a sudden the pin pattern will go from 18pins, 16pins, 14pins and 16pins to 16 pins, 14 pins, 16 pins, 18 pins, just like the N3-a terminal drawing.
Problem solved, case closed.
http://www.apexi-usa.com/pdfWiring/13.pdf