Nissan S-Cargo

[numbnuts240]

screw you, doug. i think it's charming.

[centralcoaster33]

Interesting car. I assume it has a very cute honking horn, "beep beep"! It kind of looks like a business delivery vehicle in the front. It also has a neat looking almost a van sort of back half. I'm thinking I'd put some ICE in there to make it cool to chill in the back. Then I'd get a job delivering stuff (like cheesecakes). Then I'd nickname mine the Mullet, business up front, party in the back!

[float_6969]

I'd make it mid-engine, RWD, preferably with a big V8. Then beat the snot out of people in street races and laugh uncontrollably at the look of horror on their face when they loose to a snail.

[centralcoaster33]

I like that! You'd have to tub the rear to get some rubber under it. Flared fenders to. That thing seems to be only four feet wide in stock form.

[lne937s]

If you want to see one in person, they have one at the Lane Motor Museum in Nashville, along with some other cool JDM Nissans.

http://www.lanemotormuseum.org/collection/alphaindex/n

[Bubba1]

and laugh uncontrollably at the look of horror on their face when they lose to a snail.

Seems like an appropriate name for a sleeper that looks like snail. Look at that "S-Cargo...!" (ok, i'll crawl away now)

[float_6969]

and laugh uncontrollably at the look of horror on their face when they lose to a snail.

Seems like an appropriate name for a sleeper that looks like snail. Look at that "S-Cargo...!" (ok, i'll crawl away now)

LOL! I had the same thought, but had the good sense not to type it out

[Jesda]

This is such a stupid, pointless car, and I absolutely love it.

[Bubba1]

My first thought when I saw the picture of that car?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QhrPNp1yod4[/youtube]

[MinisterofDOOM]

Not only do I like the car, but I objectively disagree that it's the ugliest car ever made. It's really not ugly in any traditional way to my eyes. There are a LOT of ugly cars out there. This one isn't among them. Weird? Hell yes. Plain? Hell yes. (And the significance of the combination of those two normally-antithetical qualities isn't lost on me.) But it's not really ugly. It's a simple execution of a basic shape with very minimal detailing. There's really nothing there to BE ugly. You could possibly poke fun at the headlights, and maybe pick on the two-tone trim, but aside from that, calling this car ugly is like accusing a circle of being too round. It barely has any qualities at all--and yet manages to be very unique. That's what we call "good design." It's something pretty much every single car in production today has entirely lost sight of. Cars today have 10,000% more details and 1,000,000% less realization of design.

Purely objectively, I can think of dozens of uglier cars than this.
PT Cruiser
Aztek
Fiat Multipla
Pretty much anything French from the last quarter century
The 2nd gen US Focus
The Akerson Malibu
Everything from Lincoln after 2009
The new F150
Every Toyota truck and SUV after 2005
The Toyota Highlander
All Ford minivans ever built
The Infiniti QX56/QX80
Pretty much every Lexus after 2000
All quad-round-headlight Mercedes Benz products (especially the W210 E class)
The Jaguar S-type
Both generations of the Smart ForTwo
The Chevy Spark
Dodge's new wrong-wheel-drive Ram Vans with their headlights pulled up like Steve Erkel's pants.
The Hyundai Sonata
The Hyundai Elantra
The Hyundai Santa Fe
The Hyundai Tucson
That dumpy-a** Hyundai/Kia minivan from 10 years ago.
The Oval Tauruses
The Ford Tempo
Most any Pontiac product after 1972
Every VW Jetta and Golf ever made
The 5th generation Camry
The Suzuki Aerio
The Daewoo Leganza
All Bangle BMWs, but especially the 6 and 5 series.
All those stupid f*** X6-style "coupelike" crossovers
And that's ignoring almost every American car built for the last 8 years of the 1970s.
It's also ignoring most non-US-market vehicles; of which Australian Fords, anything German that's not a BMW or an Audi or select MB models, Most British cars, all French cars, most Italian cars, all Russian and Soviet cars, most Korean cars, and a whole lot of Japanese cars could be included on this list.

So no, upon unbiased, unsubjective review, the S Cargo is decidedly NOT the ugliest car ever made.

I've also never understood why people think a high roof (you know, the lightest structural element of the entire car) makes a car rollover-prone. Like that stupid Mythbusters episode where everyone's suprised that a large bus--whose heavy powertrain, frame, and other actually-significantly-heavy elements are all well below the cabin floor or even the axle centerline--doesn't lean in a turn like it does in the thoroughly-scientifically-validated action movie, Speed. Nothing above the waistline actually weighs any significant amount relative to the whole. Sure, sports cars will use things like CF or magnesium to lower the CoG, but that's for very finely-tuned dynamic reasons, not "oh crap it's going to upend itself" reasons.
And considering that the S Cargo looks like it's wearing 13'' wheels, that waistline is about 30 feet below that of any random modern car. So it's probably LESS likely to roll over than your hipster Subaru.

[Bubba1]

Perhaps it might've been easier to list car designs you do like.... j/k

I'm sure you're not alone in liking that design. But I think the Nissan S-Carslow designers lifted several visual cues from one of the all-time ugliest cars (and curiously not on your list): the infamous Citroen 2CV. I think I speak for many folks that a better name for that car might be the Nissan "Puke".

[MinisterofDOOM]

I love the 2CV! (And the DS)

Perhaps it might've been easier to list car designs you do like.... j/k

Nearly did exactly that, but this is a list of cars that are uglier than the S Cargo, not just ugly cars in general.

[nissangirl74]

I like it but then again, I like niche stuff.

[centralcoaster33]

Yeah, those headlights... ugh. I know a lady whose favorite car is the Citroen Deux Chevaux. She definitely likes niche stuff. MoD I'm thinking would have a much shorter list of actually liked cars. I can relate to that.

[Bubba1]

Yeah, those headlights... ugh. I know a lady whose favorite car is the Citroen Deux Chevaux.

Yep, the Citroen is ugly, but ugly can be cool. And that Citroen is kinda cool.