Monday morning humor-Marriage

[kboy79]

Wife: 'What are you doing?' Husband : Nothing. Wife : 'Nothing...? You've been reading our marriage certificate for an hour.' Husband : 'I was looking for the expiry date.' -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Wife : 'Do you want dinner?' Husband : 'Sure! What are my choices?' Wife : 'Yes or no.' -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Wife: 'You always carry my photo in your wallet. Why?' Hubby: 'When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.' Wife: 'You see how miraculous and powerful I am for you!' Hubby: 'Yes! I see your picture and ask myself what other problem can there be greater than this one?' -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Stress Reliever Girl: 'When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your burden.' Boy: 'It's very kind of you, darling, but I don't have any worries or troubles.' Girl: 'Well that's because we aren't married yet.' ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Son: ' Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady.' Mom: 'Well, you have done the right thing.' Son: 'But mom, I was sitting on daddy's lap.' _____________________________________________________________ A newly married man asked his wife, 'Would you have married me if my father hadn't left me a fortune?' 'Honey,' the woman replied sweetly, 'I'd have married you, N O MATTER WHO LEFT YOU A FORTUNE!' -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Girl to her boyfriend: One kiss and I'll be yours forever . The guy replies: 'Thanks for the early warning.' -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------A wife asked her husband: 'What do you like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?' He looked at her from head to toe and replied: 'I like your sense of humour.' 

[kmckis1029]

when ever i read this kinda stuff it makes me not want to be married... all jokes have truth to them... thats what makes them funny...

[kboy79]

I want to be single again.

sigh....

[kmckis1029]

dont let your wife/gf see that post...

[AZhitman]

I want to be single again.

sigh....

You're doing it wrong.

[kboy79]

Don't know if you believe in God, but I think God does have a sense of humor. As soon as I get married, girls start "throwing" themselves at me. Where were they when I was single?

[pfarmer]

Don't know if you believe in God, but I think God does have a sense of humor. As soon as I get married, girls start "throwing" themselves at me. Where were they when I was single?

See what happens when you get a divorce, the girl friends of your ex wife will show up at your door.

Perry

[kmckis1029]

sadly the fact that you are taken/wanted/forbidden makes you more attractive...

[SVTCOBRA]

there is an expiration date!??