Leaving Home

[carloslebaron]

I would take the offer...if my mother allowes me to cross the street by myself...

[nissangirl74]

On the radio this morning, the talk show host was discussing the fact that more and more young people are less willing to move far from home to take a job, even for great pay and a moving allowance.

Just a second thought here... Where did said radio host get his/her information from?

He didn't reference it, or if he did, I missed it.

[bigbadberry3]

No way. You can still be independent if you live at home. Heck you can even pay rent to your parents if you want.

[MinisterofDOOM]

No way. You can still be independent if you live at home. Heck you can even pay rent to your parents if you want.

Eh, I dunno. I moved out when I was 19. Less than a year later my roommate lost his job and I paid all the bills for several months and went totally broke. When my lease expired I moved back home with my parents so I could build up some savings again. I lived in their basement for about a year or so and had it largely to myself; no one "bothered" me. I even worked nights so I was on a very different schedule from everyone else in the house. But I didn't have my own front door, I parked on the curb, I didn't have my own kitchen. When I had guests they had to cram into my bedroom. It was not remotely "independent." And I love my family, and their house. But you really can't be independent living in the same house as your parents.

I think young people are divided into two schools of thought; One is willing to do damn near anything to secure financial freedom even if it involves working 150+ hour weeks and not being able to see family/friends for months on end. The other chooses the comfort of knowing that if they stay close to home they have a crutch close by if they need it.

There's a difference between being lazy and being content.

I can understand what you're getting at. I have numerous "friends" who got married and had kids far too young, before they'd even really lived on their own or learned how to survive without mommy and daddy. Most of them live in their parents' basements now, paying no rent, and still managing to be broke with two full-time incomes, while leaving their children at home for the grandparents to deal with. And most of them have NO DESIRE to change that. No desire to move out. No desire to make it on their own. I disgusts me.

But your examples are two very extreme opposites supporting a very judgemental statement. What about the people who don't care about money but do care about their family? You might view it as noble to go off and make a fortune doing something challenging, but for people who don't care about money that situation isn't exactly rewarding. I respect a willingness to make one's way in life, but not being willing to cross the globe and do some isolated, exotic hard work for something you're not interested in in the first place (money) doesn't make a person lazy or foolish. It simply means they have different priorities than you.
You don't have to move far from "home" to be financially secure. And there are many, many more reasons than simply needing a "crutch" to stay near "home."

Also:
The term "live at home" is stupid. Wherever you live IS home. EVERYONE lives "at home."

[bigbadberry3]

No way. You can still be independent if you live at home. Heck you can even pay rent to your parents if you want.

Eh, I dunno. I moved out when I was 19. Less than a year later my roommate lost his job and I paid all the bills for several months and went totally broke. When my lease expired I moved back home with my parents so I could build up some savings again. I lived in their basement for about a year or so and had it largely to myself; no one "bothered" me. I even worked nights so I was on a very different schedule from everyone else in the house. But I didn't have my own front door, I parked on the curb, I didn't have my own kitchen. When I had guests they had to cram into my bedroom. It was not remotely "independent." And I love my family, and their house. But you really can't be independent living in the same house as your parents.

How would that be any different than living in an apartment with a roommate and a landlord?

Independent to me is self sufficient. Pay your own bills. Require no additional help.

[audtatious]

to all you graduates... as you go out into the world my advice to you is...don't go! It's rough out there. Move back with your parents. Let them worry about it.
- Thornton Melon

Seems people listened to him....

[PapaSmurf2k3]

Wherever you live IS home. EVERYONE lives "at home."

unless you're in prison or on deployment!

[NolimitZ32]

I think young people are divided into two schools of thought; One is willing to do damn near anything to secure financial freedom even if it involves working 150+ hour weeks and not being able to see family/friends for months on end. The other chooses the comfort of knowing that if they stay close to home they have a crutch close by if they need it.

There's a difference between being lazy and being content.

I can understand what you're getting at. I have numerous "friends" who got married and had kids far too young, before they'd even really lived on their own or learned how to survive without mommy and daddy. Most of them live in their parents' basements now, paying no rent, and still managing to be broke with two full-time incomes, while leaving their children at home for the grandparents to deal with. And most of them have NO DESIRE to change that. No desire to move out. No desire to make it on their own. I disgusts me.

But your examples are two very extreme opposites supporting a very judgemental statement. What about the people who don't care about money but do care about their family? You might view it as noble to go off and make a fortune doing something challenging, but for people who don't care about money that situation isn't exactly rewarding. I respect a willingness to make one's way in life, but not being willing to cross the globe and do some isolated, exotic hard work for something you're not interested in in the first place (money) doesn't make a person lazy or foolish. It simply means they have different priorities than you.
You don't have to move far from "home" to be financially secure. And there are many, many more reasons than simply needing a "crutch" to stay near "home."

Also:
The term "live at home" is stupid. Wherever you live IS home. EVERYONE lives "at home."

Please believe when I say I did not mean to offend anyone and for me to truly cover all the "groups" of people it would take damn near a novel sized post. Also you are right I do explain 2 extremes and I do agree that there are those to whom money is not the #1 priority but the only people I have ever met who think/say money is a no issue whatsoever either have mommy/daddy/old money or haven't run into a situation where they have had to truly work to get money. Now yes I am one of those who while I have the chance and am single and have no dependents am looking to make a fortune, this is not so I can have lambos and speedboats and cocaine and hookers (although that may be fun ) I want to do it more for the security I would be able to provide to my future family as well as the ability to help my parents/siblings with whatever financial troubles/issues they may have and in the process set myself up to have a very comfortable financial cushion on which I may fall if I need to so that in the future when I do have a family I won't have to go globetrotting to be able to provide a good life for the wife & kids. That's just my opinion and I by no means want to shove anything down any ones throat (unless one of the previously mentioned hookers are involved ) I'm just voicing myself in the discussion.

[szh]

On the radio this morning, the talk show host was discussing the fact that more and more young people are less willing to move far from home to take a job, even for great pay and a moving allowance.

Example: This happened in the late 90s. There was a girl working part-time in a radio station, less than 12 hours per week, for $10 / hour in the SF Bay area. She was 25 years old, a college graduate, and lived at home with her mom. Someone in San Diego found out about how good she was and came up to try and convince her to move and have her own show, airing 5 days a week. She would be starting out at $30,000, full moving expenses paid, they would set her up in an apartment, the whole nine yards. She turned them down, opting to stay where she was and continue to live with her mom, and hope something would become available soon close by.

What would you do in that scenario? Would you stay close to home or would you venture out and take a chance on the great opportunity?

I would go for moving out in a heartbeat!

Not because I had a bad life at home in any way! Bt because once I am an adult, I want to live my own like, make my own mistakes, etc., and learn.

Living at home with parental supervision (assuming I was not in financial trouble and needed help for a, hopefully brief, while) past an adult age just does not make sense to me.

I considered it my my responsibility to stand on my own two feet as soon as I could get there, so that I could help my parents later (by living with me/us perhaps) if they needed it in their old age.

Z

[MinisterofDOOM]

Please believe when I say I did not mean to offend anyone and for me to truly cover all the "groups" of people it would take damn near a novel sized post.

No offense taken.
Preparing ahead of time to support a future family is certainly a worthy goal. As is this:

I considered it my my responsibility to stand on my own two feet as soon as I could get there, so that I could help my parents later (by living with me/us perhaps) if they needed it in their old age.

Z

[240sxcl50]

Go where the money is

[MinisterofDOOM]

Go where the money is

Go where the happy is.

[PapaSmurf2k3]

Go where the happy is.

This. Just make damn sure its going to stay happy for a long time. I know lots of people that turned down AWESOME jobs or opportunities for a girlfriend, only to find out the b**** was cheating on them a month or 2 later and they broke up.

Realistically, its a tough decision and has to be weighed on a case by case basis with all circumstances on the table.

Hell, to this day I'm STILL a bit indifferent on my decision to leave. On one hand I have a pretty good job, on the other I left all my friends and my *at the time* AWESOME girlfriend back home. I guess I just try to focus on how bad it COULD have been if I stayed. No job (RI economy blows nuts), still would have broken up with the gf, and RI laws/cops suck so bad, I could have been arrested for half the s*** I do down here already.

so when I look at it like "making good money, having an OK time vs. possibly being a mooching jobless bum", then I made the right decision.

[240sxcl50]

Yeah it sucks to leave everyone behind but you can meet new friends. Attitude is everything if you go in with a bad one you probly wont have such a good time. ^also new place new cops that dont know who you are and what you drive.

[PapaSmurf2k3]

Nah I went from New England AKA tax til you die, then tax you some more (police state) to the south. There's barely any cops here, its great. Sort of like the dukes of hazzard except the roads are mostly paved.

[240sxcl50]

Barely any cops sounds good, the local cops here will get you for having your visor up while riding a motorcycle.

[arabdrifter]

shoot, id move in a heartbeat!! Anything to get out of the crap hole of MI..lol.