(1.) Like with any car, well taken ones can last a very, very long time.
(2.) The most expensive repair, seems to be the sunroof motor. Most owners, spend a weekend and do it themselves. Infiniti repairs are costly, since of course its is an Infiniti (not a Chevy) and generally most parts are only available through a Nissan/Infiniti dealer. Most forum members cut down on repair costs by doing things such as buying parts from a forum sponsor (cheaper than dealer), doing the repairs themselves (the archives are filled with how-tos and
http://www.fuzzycats.com has an extensive DIY section). Some of us have purchased FSM's (detailled service manuals) which become regularly available on Ebay and when all else fails, we take it to a trusted independent mechanic or to and Infiniti dealer. Follwing the J's maintenance schedule is also very important. Well maintained J's are essentially trouble free.
I'm not a mechanically inclined, I'm far from it, but if you could read and follow step-by-step instructions in a DIY document or FSM and own a few basic tools a lot of work on the J is easier to do than what you think. If you have issues, you always have this wonderful forum to turn to.