Post by
txchamps »
https://forums.nicoclub.com/txchamps-u241466.html
Fri Jan 03, 2020 8:40 pm
I have been with my wife now for 43 years. I am not one of those people who clucks his tongue at those who avoid relationships, avoid marriage, can't seem to make them work. or are not in a relationship for whatever reason. I don't judge people that way. Being married is hard work, and it's not for everybody. It's enough that you can make yourself and another person happy, even for a little while. It's why we're on this planet.
I will say this: If you do commit to marriage, make damn sure that it's what you want to do -- because you''re going to make some pretty heady promises to your SO, and in front of some pretty important people -- like your parents, perhaps, their parents, maybe -- but important folks who are close to you. If you are a person who believes in the strength of your word, DON'T make those promises if you do not intend to keep them. Stay single instead. It'll keep you from s*** all over some nice people -- maybe even including yourself. Maybe even your kids.
I made those promises 43 years ago, to her, her mom, her dad (who was the minister, BTW), her siblings, my mom and dad, my siblings, and some 150 other people in that church. So I had to be sure. It is a big-a** commitment, and one has gotta take it seriously. I was still pretty damned scared. Hell, I was only 22. And from the beginning, we were challenged every day.
Anyway, here we are, still together. Two grown kids, and 2 adorable little granddaughters, and I'm really glad that we made it work. No, it was not easy, but worth all the blood sweat, etc.
Now, she has stage 4 lung cancer, so we are facing the biggest challenge ever in our marriage. But neither of us is giving up, even though it's pretty scary. I don't know what I will do without her, but I cannot think of that. I have to focus on her getting well. So far she has responded well to the treatments -- better than either of us could have hoped -- so things are looking pretty dang good.
Saying those vows turned out to be the best decision I ever made. For us? Worth it!
Happy new year to all of you.